Ok, I have been avoiding writing a blog for many reasons. They are as follows:

1. I was extremely busy with the high school musical. We did The Sound of Music!

2. I was finishing up my senior year of high school and had tons of stuff to do with that.

3. I kept getting distracted by Facebook.

4. I didn't know what to write about.

5. I didn't want to write about what I thought would be a good thing to write about.

6. Then I finished school and the play and facebook got old and I ran out of excuses. So here I am writing a blog. . . finally.

I guess I just need to vent a little bit so I'm sorry if this seems a little bit random. I will try to organize it in a way that can make a little sense.

          So I have been thinking a lot lately. About the future (after
Africa of course). About what I will be. what I will do. I do not know what to think about my life right now. High school is over. All I have right now are my friends who I don't even see every day anymore. I think it is weird to think that I'm almost a "grown-up." I don't have to worry about tardys, or a dress code or what skirt to wear on Monday for chapel. I was driving in my car the other day and I just pictured myself as an adult with nothing holding me down and free to be me - whoever that is. I think it is true that life begins after high school. That is certainly the case for me because I've gone to the same school for thirteen years. I just don't know if I'm ready for this. I guess I always hoped this time would come, but now that I'm here getting ready to graduate, I just don't know what to think or what to do with myself. Now that it's here I don't know if I'm ready to go yet. I always saw the seniors when I was a freshman and they looked so grown up, but I don't feel like I look like them right now. I just want to know if I'm ready for this next step in my life: not high school.

          I thought about it a lot and I decided the reason I have been avoiding this blog is because it symbolizes me growing up. I am going out on my own next year. With no friends that I have known since birth and no parents or siblings anywhere near. This blog is a symbol of me moving on. Why am I afraid of that? I have no idea. Well maybe I'm not afraid, but I just like things the way they are now. With my best friends only ten minutes away and my neighborhood with everything I need close by. I like things right now.

          But there is a season for everything right? And right now is the end of one season and the beginning of the next. A door is closing and a window is opening. This is a great thing no matter how hard it might be - it is a good thing. And I know that God is right here with me every step of the way. He is the only thing that is not going to change in all of this. He is not moving away or going to a different school; he is staying with me. I trust him to guide me and protect me. He is all I need.

          Well, I guess that's all for right now. That felt really good to get that off my mind. Thanks for reading. Please pray for guidance in this next chapter of my life.

p.s. I love you mom and dad!